Saturday 11 May 2013

Crystal O’Future Hits Back At Critics

At a live show at Vale Park last night, Crystal O'Future spent a good proportion of her time onstage attacking her critics, to wild celebrations from the sell-out crowd.

Crystal told her fans that she would never turn her back on her calling as a medium and entrepreneur, and said that spirits would hurt her if she ignored them.

Crystal, described on her website as "Europe's most beloved medium", and a known confidante of Noddy Holder, has been caught up in controversy recently after a local crazy woman questioned her psychic powers.

"This earpiece," Crystal announced to the crowd, while pointing to it, "Is so that I can keep in touch with the Vale," she said, to rapturous applause from the crowd. "It is definitely not used to get information, no way. Anyone who says that can fuck right off."

"There are certain crazy slags out there who feel the need to shit all over my good name," added Crystal. "I shall hunt down and wreak a terrible vengeance on these pygmies."

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