The Church of Scientology is "made up of nutters" and its beliefs are "as bent as a bag of broken bollocks", says The Supreme Master, leader of Stoke cult The Master's Race.
In a frank interview on Signal Gold's Paranormal Night radio show, interspersed with hits from the 70s, The Supreme Master lambasted the American cult's recent attempts to break into the Stoke market. "Get back to your own end," he said, while holding up a picture of America to a webcam.
"They're little more than a bunch of weird, asexual freaks," continued The Supreme Master, following the playing of a track by Black Country rockers Slade. "Tom Cruise and his bald mates can suck my balls and go to hell. Not literally. Apart from the hell bit."
The Church of Scientology has yet to respond, but if it does, it will probably involve sending some of their stormtroopers to follow people around with cameras.
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