The Trial Of The Century Begins

Mick Wessex

The trial of Mick Wessex, one of Stoke's most famous paranormal investigators, for murdering his girlfriend Sharon Dynamite, began this week to wild celebrations.

"Stoke hasn't seen a trial this big perhaps ever," says legal expert Rob Patchwork. "The celebrations are justified, this is the cup final of criminal trials."

Large crowds gathered outside Fenton Magistrates Court on Monday morning ahead of the start of the trial, leading to presiding Judge Reinholder to demand clerks screen the trial on giant screens for those who couldn't get in. The area quickly became known as "Henmurder Hill".

Mr Wessex denied premeditated murder and said that he shot his girlfriend by mistake, thinking she was a ghost as her cocaine covered body was glowing under the UV lights he had on.

Early prosecution witness Kenny Bates said he found Mr Wessex leaning over Ms Dynamite's dead body, singing 'Candle In The Wind' by Elton John, the more recent version about Princess Diana, not the original one about Marilyn Monroe.

Further witnesses also claimed to have heard regular shouting and arguing at Mr Wessex's house between the couple, though Mick's barrister said this was just normal dirty talk during sex that all couples partake in.

Legal teams for both the defence and prosecution are hosting their own podcasts during the trial so fans can keep abreast of the latest news. Special celebrity guests are promised.

The trial continues next week.