Stokie Tick Hairforce got some help making his choice at the recent Brexit referendum when a friendly ghost appeared to him the night before and told him to vote LEAVE!
"I was jacking it to some German filth the night before," Tick explained, "When a ghost climbed out of my laptop screen, punched me in the cock then told me to put it away."
Doing what he was told, Tick sheathed his man-dagger, then stood up and demanded answers.
"The ghost, who called himself Sir Sensible, told me in no uncertain terms that I was to vote to leave the European Union on the morrow," Tick said.
Tick describes the ghost as having a moustache and muttonchops, glowing red eyes, a lizard tongue and syringes instead of fingernails. "He said he had Britain's best interests at heart and I believed him," Tick added.
